4 Months

 It’s hard to believe it’s already/only been 4 months.  It feels like you just joined us yet you have blended into the fold as if you have always been here.  The days of easily laying you across my lap are gone, replaced with your determined fight to sit upright even though you can’t stay that way very long.   You are like your brother, in that you seem to be very interested in what’s happening around you.  As a result you want to sit up and be held facing out to ensure you aren’t missing anything.  You also no longer totally hate being on your tummy.  As a matter of fact now that you are happily sleeping in your own room in your crib you are our second tummy sleeper (please don’t tell your Doctor).  You have mastered the roll from tummy to back and on the nights where you wake to eat (which amazingly and wonderfully for me is not EVERY night or even MULTIPLE times a night, I may never be able to fully convey my gratitude for this) I can tell before I get to you if you have rolled yourself over, as your protests are significantly more robust!

On this note, you have realized dear daughter that if you wish to be heard in this family you will need to speak up.  And so you have.  Both your volume and your tone have grown louder and more animated-no doubt in part by watching your big brother.  Speaking of that guy, as much as I’d like to say I’m your favorite person (and maybe I am depending on the moment at hand) you are completely enamored with your big brother and I assure you the feeling is mutual.  In the last few weeks you have begun to pay real attention to him; you track his voice, you reach out to touch him when he is near and you smile and laugh when he is being silly…which is often.  He, in turn, is always checking on you.  Patting your head as you eat, getting you a blanket when you are in your rock-n-play, trying to shove a teething toy in your mouth…whether you want it or not…but it all comes from a place of love.  I knew my love for you would be intense, just as it is for your brother, but I can honestly say I was unprepared for the emotion I feel when I see the two of you interacting.  It fills my heart in a totally different way and I am so beyond grateful that we were able to give you to each other.  I know it won’t always be fun and games but I pray that you will lean on and love on each other always.

You are growing so quickly, too quickly for this mamma trying to hold on tightly to all of her “last” first, and changing every day.  I can hardly wait to see more of who you are going to be but please feel free to take your time, for both of our sakes.

Love Mom